It turns out it wasn’t just reckless, immature kids who were turning sex into an idol. Strangely enough, the Purity Movement was doing it too. While a lot of what he says does align with a courtship model, Harris simply wasn’t pushing that model as hard as his critics in the documentary make it seem. The Bible doesn’t provide a one-size-fits-all program for moving from friendship to marriage. Our lives are too different, our circumstances too unique, and our God too creative to have only one formula for romance. So if we can learn to spot their mistakes, then we’ll be able to apply that lesson to most any other well-intentioned, but similarly misguided Christian movement.
I Kissed Dating Goodbye By Joshua Harris. 9781590521359
The sorting out can be a bit rough, but we get over it. Sayyid Qutb made his observations while living in Greeley, Colorado. James Dobson has moved his ministry to Colorado Springs. Although it’s not an exact correspondence, it will do for cultural perspective. I do agree with Josh’s suggestion on page 96, that, “Maybe you think I’m taking this idea too far. Maybe you’re saying, ‘You’ve got to be joking. One little kiss won’t have me hurtling toward sin.'” That’s exactly what I do think.
thoughts on “Book Review: I Kissed Dating Goodbye by Joshua Harris”
But the great doctrines of God sometimes have to be ferreted out. One can’t find the word trinity in the Bible either, but that doesn’t refute the deity of Christ. Promoting family-friendly movies including “A Night With the King” which is a takeoff on the story of Esther.
He wrote the Christian case against dating. Now he’s splitting from his wife and faith.
Of course, Joshua is all in favor of dating after they marry. I am not here faulting Joshua for not being consistent—because who is entirely consistent all the time in affairs of the heart? —but I’m putting his “kissing dating goodbye” into the perspective of kissing dating “see you around,” or “see you later,” that kind of goodbye.
I’m not saying that the book is completely wrong, it brings up a few good points, but ultimately…I don’t know that any book can tell you how to date or how to live. For many reading this book, I think a lot of guilt and shame could be felt – some is helpful and necessary, but I think there could be some that is unnecessary. Joshua Harris said in an article that a regret he has about this book is that it de-emphasized grace – the grace that is so central to the gospel – and I could see what he meant as I was reading. This book is full of wonderful suggestions such as dating your wife or husband once you are married and many others. This book does not say that dating is sinful and explains that rejecting typical dating does not mean that you’ll never spend time alone with a guy or girl. I first heard of Josh Harris on a Christian radio station.
“No ice with hoops. Get to keep your size twelves on Mother Earth’s booty.” I was headed back to Oregon after having visited my folks in Pennsylvania for Thanksgiving, 1970, when I was more or less waylaid by Christians in Dayton who wanted to help me with my Christian growth. Now, we Jesus people had quite a bit of exuberance sharing our faith, so it was nothing for us to go up to perfect strangers and strike up conversations about the Lord. So it was that my first evening in Dayton, Ohio, I went to a coffee shop and engaged a rather dignified elderly man in conversation about Christianity. I like the one about the nail puller on page 112. Seems it should be used when crooked construction is first found, before the rest of the building gets thrown off kilter as well.
“Good God, please don’t let Islam be like this.” He didn’t know if he was talking to himself, God, or his friends. I can’t tell this story to the American people. “If I tell ’em this, they’ll say I’m a hateful narrow-minded bigot with an over-active imagination. There has to be another explanation.” “This whole charade was played out at the Ka’aba itself. Abdul Muttalib followed the sorcerer’s advice and started offering camels in groups of ten. But by the time he’d sacrificed several sets, not a single rock had so much as stirred. Not even a wiggle.” “Yeah. She tells the proud papa to offer the pagan gods camels instead of his son, Abd-Allah. She says that he should keep increasing the number until the gods say enough already.”
Now, take the old way of thinking, in terms of lines. Say, Patty is thinking of becoming a Christian but first wants to count the cost. For her sex life, we tell her, she as a Christian would want to be a little further removed from sluttishness.
I was driving and listening to him talk about the pitfalls of modern dating. I was so captivated by his message, that I sat in the car listening long after I arrived at my destination. I find it very telling how Harris has apologized for the hurt his book has caused and seems to be stepping away from it altogether. On his website, he is now accepting stories from IKDG readers on how it affected their lives. Old news, I know, but it’s a step and I can’t help but feel proud of him for sincerely trying to understand.
Though he did not found these movements and though he was not their lone voice, he was certainly among their foremost popularizers. The homeschooled wunderkind who first made a bang with his New Attitude magazine, triggered a full-out explosion with his 1997 debut book, I Kissed Dating Goodbye. It went on to sell over a www.datingranking.org/meeyou-review million copies and to impact countless lives and relationships. In an effort to set a high standard, the book emphasized practices and concepts that are not in the Bible. In trying to warn people of the potential pitfalls of dating, it instilled fear in many readers—fear of making mistakes or having their heart broken.
Only made a splash because it was written by a young, attractive male who claimed to have quit dating for good. Don’t listen to me, though, read it for yourself and make up your own mind- unlike the author would have you do. What I mean to say is, we know what we want and we expect God to get us there without any effort on our part.
It is like the alcoholic stating that Jesus drank wine, Paul told Timothy to take a little wine for his ailments, and the Passover is warrant to drink alcohol even though it will hurt them . One thing I strongly dislike is this “all guys/girls are evil and out to get me EXCEPT for my future husband/wife” mindset. If you actually believe that, it will show, trust me.